In this latest podcast episode, number 36 in my series, we continue discussing the final section of my new parenting book which is the Q&A section of that book. This podcast focuses on Question #5 in that section, and info about that particular question and its answer is below, but first, I wanted to share a thought.
Personally, I am very big on the concept of championing others. If you think about how you feel when someone champions and supports you, you would probably say that makes you feel proud, uplifted, fulfilled, etc. So, imagine how it feels to do that to others, especially to children. When I was a teacher, I had very strong relationships with my students and had effective communication with them as a result, but one of the key building blocks of that strong relationship was that the kids were always championed by me for one reason or another. As a result, the students always knew that I had their back, and that enabled them to have a level of trust and admiration for me that served to make the relationship and the communication we had be as clear and effective as possible. I also wanted to say that I have a number of friends both personal and professional who continue to champion me in my efforts, and I am eternally grateful for that support.
Back to the book… the book we are referring to is my recently published parenting guide titled I LIKE HOW YOU SPEAK TO ME… A PARENT’S GUIDE FOR EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION WITH CHILDREN which is intended to be a real “how to” book for parents, family members or teachers. As the title directly states, the book is all about creating and maintaining the clearest possible model for parent-child communication. The parenting book offers up my “10 Governing Principles” for communicating with children followed by a children’s picture book section that models a conversation and it wraps with a Q&A section of the book which is comprised of the TEN MOST FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS FROM PARENTS (plus one bonus 11thquestion).
Last week we reviewed the fourth question and its answer, and this week we’ve arrived at the FIFTH question in that section of the book which is: “What do I do with my children who always want to talk when I am uncomfortable talking because I don’t know what to say?” I love the honesty of this question, and it brings up a number of aspects of parenting and parent-child communication that are important to explore.
One thing to keep in mind is that we are all different. Some of us are natural extroverts while others are the opposite. It is important that you recognize the personality traits of your child and work within their personality range.
Another important piece of the answer to this question above is that you may want to share your own vulnerability with your child. By being honest and showing your child that you may not have all the answers and that you are also a learner as you go through life, it will not only bring you and your child closer together because you share the feeling of vulnerability, but it will also inspire your child to continue to be a learner themselves.
One caveat regarding this honest communication with your child is to never offer up a point of view that places burden on your child. For example, if you are not getting along with your mate, you should not share that with you child in a way that burden the child with information or potential decision-making related to your own stress.
Finally, there is professional help for situations where you have subject matter that your child wants to discuss that is uncomfortable for you. As with other aspects of your honest communication with you child, sharing your vulnerability and involving the child in this process will earn you respect and bring you and your child ever closer together.
The next podcast will focus on the sixth question in the Q&A section of the book about effective communication with children, so please stay tuned for that. In the meantime, thanks for visiting and for listening. You can hear Podcast 36 here:
And you can find the parenting guide on Amazon right here: